Paranoia!!

Paranoia is unquestionably an effect with Bi-Polar, You slowly begin to cope with it, but it may take years, for me it is increasingly bad when on a mild and stronger high. To the point where sometimes it seems to end the episode as I recluse fearing that everyone is looking at me, especially when I'm out and about with my wife and kids...I'm a young Dad and I often feel that people are looking at me thinking "Oh that poor child with such a young immature Father" We will get to the car after rushing out when it gets too much, and I can place a ton of people that looked at me "funny" and my wife couldn't recall any such happenings!

Also trust, I have a terrible time trusting people, a friend may ask to give his friend a ride somewhere, and I can't stop looking in the rear-view, coming up with elaborate theories about how it's a conspiricy and they are going to jack my car! It really is crazy when you think about it, and the majority of the time no-one is any the wiser what my nutty brain is running to it's 'crazy place'

I have always been a distrusting and paranoid person since as far back as I can remember which for some reason isn't much before I was about 13 (many shrinks have tried and failed to work that one out lol) It has lead to me having only really 2 or 3 friends my whole life, lots of 'mates' but to me there is an enormous difference between "mates" and "friends"